PHP WEB DEVELOPERS WANTED

ModernMethod is seeking full-time skilled PHP programmers well versed in CSS and Ajax in South Florida to work on our various super-secret projects and existing web sites. Send a resume with some cool stuff you've programmed recently to info@modernmethod.com

FREELANCE WRITERS IN SAN FRANCISCO (AREA) WANTED

We don't have an office in San Francisco. Not yet, anyway. We go there often, but sometimes we have great events, parties, and other video game happenings that our ridiculous schedules simply just cannot squeeze in. If you'd like to go in our place and get paid for it (or living the dream, as we call it) please contact us.

Job requirements

A great conversational writing voice, a kind personality, an internet connection. That's pretty much it.

The job entails taking photographs, video, and writing about how much you had with a bunch of stuff like games, movies, and toys that are not available to the public yet. If this sounds like your dream job, send us a ton of information why you're the guy. Include what you'd like to pay us for the opportunity. Just kidding! As long as you're not a child pornographer or terrorist, we'd probably like to meet you. All we ask is that you provide us with some witty writing samples about the topic you'd like to write about directly to the editor in chief of your desired web site. If you already blog, send us those links.

Something else in mind?

Talk to the boss. It may take a week or two for him to respond, because he is a horrible, horrible person who already hates you. Actually, he gets a metric ton of email daily.

niero@destructoid.com